interstellar90210 | The real drug was the friends we made on our journey

Drug Lord Bai Shen
By Shade S. Lim

Despite the popularity of Virgo band Vandalism In Progress, its been rife with creative difficulties. Just as the band found success, eccentric saxophone player Bill Cipher received a critical injury, losing the ability to see out his right eye. Not long after the South Vista Music Fest, lead vocalist Bolin retired from the band for reasons unknown. Percussionist Haru Miura followed soon-after, disappearing from the limelight entirely. In spite of best efforts from your loyal journalists, neither Bolin or Miura has been seen by reporters since. Now a latest batch of trouble has hit the Vandalism in Progress.

Trombone player Sans Esqueleto has been notorious for abandoning various projects, from college degrees to numerous other bands. It should not be too surprising to readers, especially those following the news, that Esqueleto has recently been shuffled off to a rehabilitation center after several embarrassing drug filled nights. An expected outcome for the artist? Another string of bad luck for the troubled band? Or something more sinister?

Recent reports suggest that Esqueleto was dared to indulge his Toc-Tic addiction by fellow band member Bai Shen. This isn’t Bai Shen’s first sign of depravity. Along with toying with the hearts of women, he was surrounded by controversy last December for laughing as a young girl was almost run over by an 18-wheel bus. With more and more signs of his cruel nature, its become increasingly clear that not only does Shen enjoy watching people suffer, he thrives off it. Could he be responsible for the disappearance and suffering of his bandmates? Its more likely than you think.

Cipher has been notoriously quiet on his injury. Is he hiding a personal shame? Or is the truth being held over his head as blackmail? Our completely real, anonymous source revealed that before the incident, Cipher had spent every night inhaling dozens of sugary pixie sticks. Could he have pulled out his eye in a fructose-fueled rampage? Or did Shen remove the eye for kicks and grins while his partner was unconscious?

With multiple connections to the drug trade revealed, the fates of his vanished bandmembers becomes increasingly more ominous? Are they lost somewhere in the bad side of town, injecting skittles and breath mints into their veins? Information is hard to uncover, but we’ll keep on the look-out dear readers, if you promise to avoid and warn others of notorious drug kingpin Bai Shen.

The real drug was the friends we made on our journey

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