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Corrupted or Cult Leader?: Kido's Company Continues to Compound

by: Ono Notagain

Fame, fortune and security. You’d think that the lucky few that have signed on with Pride Records and Virgo Entertainment would recognize that they have it all. But apparently, for some, it’s not enough. Take, for instance Tsubomi Kido, the bassist of System Crash.

The center of a recent demon possession scandal, Kido has been seen recently making several visits with Vandalism in Progress’s pianist, Celty Sturluson. These visits were conducted in private until the possibility of Kido’s possession was uncovered earlier in the month. After recognizing the pair, valliant keepers of the faith responded by unleashing her only currently known weakness, crackers. Kido responded angrily, defending Celty, who simply responded by consuming the snacks. This very clearly means two things. First, Celty is currently being sponsored by buttery snack crackers. Second, Tsubomi Kido very clearly cares for the pianist. Their private meeting, according to the cell phone video taken, was to exchange heartfelt solstice gifts. One witness swears there were loving caresses exchanged. What a scandal.

If one lover was not enough to toy with, Kido has also taken to spending time with MANTICORE’s frontman, Genos. Witnesses have noted that the pair have often been appearing at each other’s doors often lately. In a solstice visit, Kido offered him a gift red-faced with emotion. Only the next day, Genos returned the favor, staying in the System Crash penthouse for an unseemly amount of time. On top of that, not long before, Genos was seen practically carrying a clearly inebriated Kido home. One would think his intentions were untoward, but they were recently seen enjoying a lunch date on the town. It must have really been something special, as Kido appeared dressed up. The bassist is never known to leave a hoodie at home, but was even dressed in a skirt! Fans of the androgyny must be severely disappointed that she’s dropped it for someone. And it must really be someone special.

Both of these couplings are not following long after a recent lover’s spat between her and Junkyard Carnival’s bassist, Xanxus. The two were first seen competing in the musician organized Bassoff only a few months ago and from those who could see backstage, were getting along wonderfully. However, not long after, the two came to blows at a surprise Pride Records joint concert. While they were dragged off of each other, the relationship seemed sour until someone spotted Kido slipping into a room with Xanxus alone at a party. The two might not get along as great as some, but it’s clear there is still some flame between them. One has to wonder how healthy the relationship really is--though it doesn’t seem to be stopping them from spending time together.

If three confirmed lovers was not enough, there are reports of Kido approaching several other musicians for an intimate moment. Flashstep’s B and Surviving Friday’s Momo Kisaragi have also been seen with her in private, according to our sources. And in addition to Xanxus, Kido has been spotted most definitely with both Yuffie and Lucifer of Junkyard Carnival on their own, as well a in meetings with the entire band. She has also been seen in private moments with members of Vandalism in Progress, most specifically in several meetings with Bill Cipher. It seems she has no shame.

We must warn readers to be very careful, though. It might appear that the rumors about Kido’s possession are true, as not long after the article was published, several of Kido’s lovers have taken to hiding their eyes, or blatantly flaunting their new redness. Possibly the leader of this new blindfolded gang, Kido might truly be dangerous. Please approach her with caution, as her temper seems as strong as ever, and she now has the beginnings of a cult behind her.