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[stylistic_disloyalty]

WE'RE LOSING HIM!: Has Junkyard Carnival Been Beaten at Their Own Game?!
By Johnny Sixtones

If you were out by the Variable on February 13th, you already know that the very fabric of Junkyard Carnival is being punched full of holes by one Superbia Squalo of MÄNTICORE. The metal cellist held a seasonal concert at the club, and it came to an almost grinding halt when he invited former metalhead and current bassist of our beloved Junkyard Carnival Xanxus on stage for a duet. What followed, no one was expecting.

The pair engaged in what could only be described as a hardcore, musical romance publicity stunt with Squalo and Xanxus singing to one another, and Squalo eventually dropping to one knee in front of the bassist. Many swore that they were witnessing some kind of proposal, and that Xanxus and Squalo had kept some kind of relationship a secret. However some fans were disappointed to realize that it seemed to only be a gesture of allegiance or perhaps a request...

It's no secret that MÄNTICORE has recently lost their bass prodigy Ryuko Matoi, and it would stand to reason that the group is looking for her replacement. Could Squalo have been courting Xanxus, paving the way to a formal offer to abandon the Carnival and join a metal band again? No member of Junkyard Carnival could be reached for comment, but it is this reporter's opinion that the loss of Xanxus would be devastating to one of the scene's most radical and innovative groups. Twitter exploded with support for Xanxus remaining with Junkyard Carnival and calling Squalo an "interloper" and a "skinny-ass poacher", but seemed to ignore the fact that the Carnival often employed the same techniques to recruit former drummer Fetch Walker and guitarist Poe Dameron.

Will the Carnival lose their bass before they can replace their drummer? We can only hope Xanxus will stay loyal to those who have ran with him up until now, and resists the call to return to metal.